funny tech support stories 025

A few days ago, we had a call from a couple of guys trying to get on the ‘net (big surprise, eh? ). Their userid was listed as belonging to a drug and alcohol rehab facility up north – and I don’t think that these guys were staff, if you catch my drift. Anyway, they had an annoying habit everytime we’d ask them a question they weren’t sure of: either they’d simply ignore the question and pretend we hadn’t asked it, leaving us with silence, or the one we were talking to would stick his hand over the phone and talk to the other guy about it. Sometimes after one of these consultations, we would suddenly find ourselves talking to the other one.

Jim was the agent who took their first call. He started out by trying to find out a bit about their computer and situation. He asked them what kind of computer they had. Silence. He asked them whether they were running Windows 3.1 or Windows 95. Silence. Finally, trying to get something out of them, he asked them if they had a mouse. Still silence. This went on for several minutes. Jim finally suggested that perhaps they were running Windows 95. To this they happily agreed.

The next thing we needed to know is what version of the Sympatico software they were using (or trying to use). The older version of our software comes on diskettes, whereas the new version comes on a CD-ROM. So Jim asked them if their Sympatico software was on diskettes or a CD-ROM. No response. He then explained the difference: a diskette is a plastic square thing, and a CD-ROM is round and shiny. They indignantly responded that they knew this. So he asked them which one they had: diskette or CD-ROM. “Diskette.” “Is it shiny?” he asked. “Yes.”

After lots more of the same, Jim finally determined that they hadn’t even installed the software yet! He left them doing that.

A little while later, they phoned back. This time, I was the “lucky” one who took their call. I went through the same sort of stuff that Jim did, and finally found that their modem didn’t really seem to be set up properly. So, I told them to take contact the place where they bought their computer/modem, and get them to fix it. I figured that would be the last we should hear from them for a little while.

Close, but not quite. About ten minutes later, Jim got a call from our Sales department. Apparently, these two guys phoned Sales and asked them to help get them running! Jim explained the situation, and Sales also told the guys to go to their dealer. I kind of wonder whom they phoned next…